On crying over boys,being Stuck In Love and not being a good writer.

Assalam Aleykum Warahmatullahy Wabarakatuhu

Hey guys

This is what 4a.m looks like where i am.Well its actually 3.47a.m and i still haven't had a wink of sleep.It's becoming quite a trend unfortunately.I also pulled an all nighter on Friday because i had an assignment due on Saturday as well as an exam that i had absolutely zero preparation for.I keep saying i won't be doing this to myself anymore,but there i am, in the same situation every other exam season.Quite frankly, i'm really glad exams are over.I always seem to have this cycle where i think i have enough time to study,realize i don't,realize that i have not even a single piece of information on that particular subject,panic,get my shit together and finally study like my life depends on it.It seems to work for me but i can only do it for so long.Its quite exhausting actually.

Its cold outside.Not freezing cold but you can feel the coolness and dampness in the breeze.I don't like the cold to be honest.Well actually i don't like to feel the cool breeze brush against my bare skin.But i like it if i'm dressed warmly and my clothes feel like a bear tight hug.The frogs in my neighbour's compound are croaking.Its quite annoying because its not at all melodious or harmonious.Just a bunch of frogs with croaky voices competing to see who will be the loudest.Normally its the dogs that are just blatantly irritating with all their endless barking,but today they seem to be well behaved.And i've been up all night so i would know.I wonder how the neighbours deal with all the fracas though.They must really be knocked out.Probably after getting high.

I cried over a boy today.The last time i cried over a boy was in 2013.It feels yerky and stupid now that i think of it.I now remember why i put it off for so long.I keep looking at myself in the mirror to see if the swelling in my eyes have gone down.People compliment my eyes alot.But they've never seen how ugly and blood shot they get when the waterfall starts flowing.I'm quite the ugly crier.I think i might even be worse than Kim Kardarshian, and she's really winning in the ugly criers category.There's someone playing 2pac songs right now, and i can feel my head migraining to the beat.But this being a building full of college students i think late night playlists are warranted.Loud late night playlists.Especially since we're all recovering from last week's mid-semester exams.

Stuck in Love is definitely one of my favourite films ever.Since i've been taking my Principles of Broadcasting course,i've become quite analytical when it comes to watching films.Or anything for that matter.My lecturer asked me when i got married the other day. He noticed that i was wearing a ring on my 'wedding-ring finger'.I honestly pay no attention to such things.I just wear rings because i want to.Also, my fingers tend to magically expand and contract so sometimes my rings only fit on certain fingers.Does this happen to anyone else?Anyway, i was in the middle of my exam when he put a sheet of paper on my desk with the question 'Kadzo, when did you get married?' I simply replied that it was a strategy to confuse all the thirsty college boys.That felt like a much more comprehensive answer compared to 'my fingers got fat and this is the only finger my ring could fit into'.Best lecturer ever if you ask me.

The course is basically about learning how to tell stories through pictures.Filmmaking in simpler terms.Which is why i've fallen even deeper for the movie 'Stuck in Love.' There's a scene where Bill, a successful writer is caught red handed reading his son's (Rusty) journal when it's clearly an invasion of privacy, and he also promised he would never dare to.Bill pays his kids Rusty and Sam to keep journals so that they can focus on their writing.The two are also aspiring writers.It's basically an awesome movie about love,books and a bunch of writers.How awesome is that?Their conversation flows a little like this:

Bill caught red handed reading Rusty's journal.

(After Rusty confronts his dad about reading his journal and his dad explains to him why he read his journal...)

Rusty: Flattery is not going to get you out of this.
Bill: Oh no, that's, that's coming to an end right now. You know Flannery O'Connor?
Rusty: I know Flannery O'Connor.
Bill: She said, nothing needed to happen in a writer's life after they were twenty.By then they'd experienced more than enough to last their creative life, so-
Rusty: So what's your point?
Bill: My point is... Rusty, i don't think you're experiencing enough.I mean the reason you're so comfortable leaving your goddamn journal here on my desk is because, there's nothing you're trying to hide from me in your life.And that really worries me.

To be honest it worries me too.I don't know why but this conversation really resonated with me.My mind keeps on skipping to ten years from now and the regrets that my heart will harbour.Might harbour. And i look at myself now and wonder if i'm seeking out life and really having experiences that will last me a lifetime.And quite frankly i came to the realization that i'm really not that good of a writer.I can see the characters in my troubled mind going on about their different activities.I can hear their breathing, their laughter. And i can almost see what they feel and even feel what they feel.But i just cannot seem to get it right on paper.My words never seem to do these characters and their stories any justice.

Hence in my helpless attempt to gain more experience, i find myself questioning the worthiness of my cause.But then again here i am.Crying over a boy.After two years of not really stopping to feel anything for anyone.So i would say it seems to be working?Also, i called a boy a whore today.Well technically yesterday.Not directly, although i did say he sounded like a whore.And he got vexed with me.At first i did not care or rather convinced myself that i did not care, because i barely know him and vice versa,but now i feel that it may have been more of a hoick in terms of my actions rather than a well thought out agenda.I do hope the poor lad is okay.

I've become quite mean lately.I think.Moody and even misanthropic.Also i curse more than i usually do.But to be honest i find it quite exhilarating.I'm scared that i may be changing way too drastically in a short period of time.However, my diary entries have increased significantly which is something i am happy with.Although the content i find to be a bit troubling. I had stopped journaling completely but i now remember how therapeutic it used to be and still is.Hopefully i get better at this writing thing.And this whole life thing in general.It's now 5.14am. I don't see myself sleeping a wink today, but we'll see.I have my Principles of Broadcasting class at 3.30p.m. Let's all pray that i don't fall asleep in class.Also, it's my brother's birthday today.Happy birthday M!
I can hear the Cock crowing now.I pray it's a good day.Hopefully coffee will suffice.

When I feel unworthy.

Assalam Aleykum Warahmatullahy Wabarakatuh

Hi everyone!

Source (how gorgeous is this image though?)

I always have those days when i feel unworthy,when i sit down and wonder if i can really achieve all that i want to achieve.When i ask Allah (sw) why He chose to give me these dreams and aspirations.Everywhere i look i see amazing people doing amazing things and i can't help but feel so inadequate.I know i shouldn't be comparing myself to others because everyone's journey is different and Allah (sw) blesses people in different ways,but i just can't help it.

Sometimes,that feeling of unworthiness can be paralyzing.Other time's it's the uncertainty and fear.What if i can't handle all these things that i want to achieve?At the same time,i don't want to forsake my goals because of fear.What kind of life would that be? E.E Cummings said," It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are", and quite frankly,i couldn't agree more.The only problem is, i'm not even sure of exactly who i want to be.Everyday i discover new things about myself.I change my mind.I change what i like and what i don't like.I read new books and form new opinions and ideas.I develop new theories about life that people would think to be totally insane but to me they're actually quite accurate.Everyday i learn and i grow Alhamdulillah.

I guess what i'm saying is that i'm scared.I'm scared of how powerful my dreams are and how hard i'm willing to push myself to get there.Because what if i get there,and i don't like it?And i want to change my mind?Will all that hard work,the exhaustion,the tears and sweat be all for nothing?Would i have to start all over again?Am i even cut out for that?

It's true what they say, that our biggest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.That it is our light and not our darkness that most frightens us.I was recently listening to a lecture by Sheikh Zahir Mahmood where he said that believers should have high aspirations.That you maybe a loser to the people,but as long as you stand with Allah (SW),you will never be a loser to Him (sw).And who matters more really?He is the one who blessed you with those dreams and even gave you the strength to want to pursue them.Because honestly,it takes a certain God-given kind of energy to reach for the stars.And not everyone is blessed with that kind of energy.That only comes from Allah (sw).

Then i thought about our beloved Prophet (saw) and how he was sent to mankind as the final messenger.As a mercy to mankind and a warner to the people.Can you imagine being tasked with such a mission?Subhanallah what an amazing man,he took on the challenge head on.Despite the fear,the doubts,the haters and the bad days.Despite everything,he (saw) marched forward and strove to fulfill his goals.And that is my message today.

If you're feeling down know that you're not alone.And if you're feeling confused know that you're not on your own.Your not the first to feel unworthy or to feel afraid and you'll definitely not be the last.Just look at the lives of all the greats,they went through even more that what we go through,yet they never gave up.Which is why we call them 'Greats' today.So don't trip.Keep your head up and keep pushing.The key is to cast those negative thoughts away and keep pushing because yes.YOU ARE WORTHIT.And we are here for a reason and for a season.So lets make it count.Allah (sw) is with us,and if Allah (sw) is with us then we are definitely in good hands.Trust Allah (sw) and remember:

{And when My slaves ask you (O' Muhammad) concerning Me, then (answer them), I am indeed near (to them by My knowledge). I respond to the invocations of the supplicant when he Calls on Me (without any mediator or intercessor).So let them obey Me and believe in Me so that they may be led aright}.    [{Qur'an 2: 186}]

This quote was actually given to me by my high school desk mate Charlene,and i just want her to know that i'm really grateful and that She is such a beautiful soul mashaallah.It's from the movie, 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.'

"For what it's worth it's never too late to be who you want to be.There's no time limit,stop whenever you want.You can change or stay the same; there are no rules to this thing.We can make the best or the worst of it.I hope you make the best of it.And i hope you see things that startle you.I hope you feel things you've never felt before.I hope you meet people with a different point of view.I hope you live a life you're proud of.If you find that you're not,i hope you find the strength to start all over again."

And that's all there is to it really.

Remind me about Ramadhan.

Assalam Aleykum Warahmatullahy Wabarakatuh!

Salaam!

Dear Maryam,

I want to remind you.Remind you of the time when you were younger and you used to get so excited about Ramadhan.You loved the whole hustle and bustle that came with it and even the mood in the air seemed to change.It was like the whole universe new it was a special time.Helping your mother around the kitchen and going out shopping for new items for the house became a treat, and you always looked forward to redecorating the house for Ramadhan.You were not of the age of fasting yet,but boy did you put your best foot forward.The environment you were in was just so incredible even little kids as young as five years old were fasting.It was amazing subhanallah.

But it seems like you forgot. People forgot.They got into a routine and forgot about what an amazing visitor was at their doorstep.They forgot about the real value and importance of Ramadhan.It became a month of routine rather than a month of reflection.A month of extravagance and wastefulness rather than a month of gratitude.They forgot about how the Companions of the Prophet (SAW),may Allah (SW) have mercy on them used to pray for six months prior to Ramadhan for Allah (sw) to allow them to see this great visitor.And after,they would pray for the next six months for Allah (sw) to accept from them their Ramadhan for fear that they may not have harvested from this great month.Subhanallah,what about you today?When was the last time you asked Allah (sw) to accept your deeds from last Ramadhan? When did you last cry to Allah (sw) for fear that your deeds were not accepted?Do you even care?Subhanallah.

I want to remind you and I,that Ramadhan is around the corner.Ask Allah,beg Allah,cry to Allah (sw) to allow you to reach this month because wallahy (I swear by Allah) it is not a guarantee.We walk around unashamed of our faults as if Allah (sw) is not the All-Seeing and All-Knowing.As if the angel of death is not going to pay us a visit.Subhanallah,this is a golden opportunity for you to completely change your life.Take it and hold on tight.It has occurred,that Ramadhan came and you felt like you did a good job but then three months later you were back to your bad habits astaghfirullah.But it happens.That doesn't mean that you should give up.Use this amazing opportunity,this amazing time to start a fresh.To change  and change for good and for the better.

This Ramadhan, is your Ramadhan.It is a time for you to beg Allah (sw) that He keeps you strong,firm and steadfast.That He makes you among those who strive for His sake.Who forsake this dunyah and leave off all that displeases Him.I won't lie to you.It's terrifying and it's not going to be easy.Shaytaan 'audhubillah (I seek refuge in Allah (sw)) keeps whispering to you that you won't make it.That this is just going to be another regular Ramadhan.But no,not this time bi'idhnillah.Don't let that arrogant coward drag you to jahannam with him!This time i've reminded you of who Ramadhan is.What Ramadhan is about.Its about polishing the heart.It's about making sincere changes to make your life better.It's about living life the way the one who gave you life wants you to live it.

If you have a stain on your shirt,isn't it more sensible to wash it rather than bedazzle it or perfume it?Therefore,if your heart is stained with misdeeds,doesn't it make more sense for you to leave off those bad deeds and then increase in your good deeds?Why do you then ignore all the wrongs you do and try to decorate, cover them up or forget about them while focusing only on good deeds?Do you not know that just like a good deed can wipe away a bad one, so can a bad deed wipe away a good one?Why do you then cherry pick the deen of Allah (sw) as if it's a game?Have you no fear?

My dear Maryam,i am only reminding you because the reminder benefits the believers and i love you for the sake of Allah (sw).I want to see you in Jannahtul Firdaus!The highest jannah because i know you can do it.Take this opportunity seriously.Ramadhan is a powerful time.Things happen.Magical,miraculous things happen.Don't underestimate the Power of Allah (sw),He is Al-Qadir, the most Powerfully Able.I know that if you trust in Him and strive for Him,He will not let you go.He will not disappoint you.

{Do`you know of any who is similar to Him? (Of course none is similar or co-equal or comparable to Him,and He has none as partner with Him).(There is nothing like Him and He is the All- Hearer, the All-Seer}.                                                                                                                     {Qur'an 19: 65}

{No doubt!Verily, the Auliya of Allah (i.e those who believe in the oneness of Allah and fear Allah much (abstain from all kinds of sins and evil deeds which He has forbidden),and love Allah much (perform all kinds of good deeds which He has ordained),no fear shall come upon them nor shall they grieve.}                                                                                                                         {Qur'an 10:62}

Maryam,I have reminded you of Ramadhan.Now,the ball is in your court.

With Love.

source

Finding Myself...

Assalam Aleykum Warahmatullahy Wabarakatuh!

Hiiiiiiii! :)

Source: Tumblr

Assalam Aleykum guys!!Oh my goodness.I don't even want to count how long it has been,i mean are you kidding me?Subhanallah ok,ok let me just calm my nerves and explain to you guys where i have been and what i have been upto.

Last i checked,i was letting you guys know about all the adventures i would be taking part in, that is the meetings and school expeditions.Well,those happened.And then finals came and i just felt so exhausted subhanallah.I literally just wanted to throw in the towel and just take a breather.And so when the holidays came,even though i had the urge to write,i still couldn't because i had to prepare for the next semester's activities for the various clubs i'm in and i still had an assignment to finish!!!!Can you believe that?FYI our holidays usually last for about three weeks to a month and sometimes we get spill over assignments that are submitted through email...baah (-_-).So yeah that was my ordeal.As you can see,i have been quite busy even my holiday was full of random to do lists.But Alhamdulillah, i learnt alot and I survived!What do you know,what doesn't kill you actually makes you stronger!

To add onto all that,it got to a point where i just wasn't happy with where i was and who i was. There was an emptiness inside of me that made me lose my motivation. Everything felt wrong if that makes any sense.I had lost my direction and so i was walking around carrying out different functions that weren't fulfilling to my life.I didn't have that feeling of felicity and even when i did, it just wasn't enough.Thus i knew that i needed to take a step back and just rethink everything and really search within myself to find out what i really wanted and who i wanted to be.

So when the Journey of Faith conference came to Nairobi once again, i knew this was exactly what i needed.The Journey of Faith conference is a three day Islamic conference that is subhanallah,so amazaing!I was not able to attend the first one that happened last year,so when i had the opportunity to attend this one,i knew it was Allah SW's plan for me.I felt that i needed that recharge in my Iman and that this was what i needed in my life.That connection i had with Allah (sw) was lost and i desperately needed to get it back.Alhamdulillah,the conference exceeded my expectations.It was absolutely breathtaking and all the lectures were insanely inspiring tabarakallah.May Allah (sw) reward all those who were involved in making this fabulous,blessed event such a success.Ameen.

Alhamdulillah fast forward to current times,i'm feeling much,much better and it is only by Allah (sw)'s grace and mercy.I have made quite a few changes in my life that have improved my inner well-being a great deal.Although i'm still a diamond in the rough and i'm still working on becoming a better muslimah.Basically i'm at a better place,much better place Alhamdulillah :).
I have also been blessed so much that i'm now working on opening my own boutique in shaa Allah...SO EXCITED!So please make dua for me.

After all the stories,i would really like to apologize for the lack of posts.As my avid regular readers know,i have not been having wi-fi in my apartment and had to go all the way to the school library to access the internet.Furthermore, lack of a camera has also constricted my creativity flow which also contributed to my loss of motivation to post.Because i like giving you guys,creative,interesting content to indulge in and all this was killing my vibe :(. But Alhmdulillah i now have wi-fi again!!!May Allah (sw) make it beneficial for me Ameen.

I had really missed blogging and i absolutely love my blog and love producing beneficial content for all my readers.I therefore want to keep up with my blog  and my writing as i love doing it and finding a creative outlet to release my thoughts and emotions is always a healthy thing.I pray you guys are all doing extremely well in shaa Allah.I want to thank all those lovely sisters who have been checking up on me on  my facebook,leaving comments on my blog,following me on twitter, Jazakillah khayr!!!I love you guys so much subhanallah and i pray Allah (sw) increases us in love for His sake.Ameen!!
See you guys really soon in shaa Allah.Bye!!!

To My Dear Future Daughter...

Assalam Aleykum Warahmatullahy Wabarakatuhu!

Heeeyyy ;)

Image via Pinterest

Whenever i imagined giving advice to my daughter,i always envisioned giving her words that felt like ice cream on a sunny afternoon.But when i stumbled upon this on tumblr,i couldn't help but nod my head along to every single word.As a muslim girl, my mind never fathomed the fact that one day i would be able to relate to such aspects of life.But we all have our on journeys in life.

When i was little,i pictured myself living the life of the perfect muslimah.Going to school,getting married,raising kids.Basically smooth sailing,no bumps on the road.I had everything planned out.But one day i woke up and it dawned on me that the perfect muslimah is full of flaws.That she has perfected the art of making mistakes,that she cries and she laughs.She likes people she can't have and wants things she can't have.
But she also learns and grows.She learns that the beauty she sees in others didn't come easy.Just like she struggled to be the butterfly she has become,others did to.
And that at the end of the day, its all about being better than you were yesterday and giving it all you've got.So...

Dear future daughter:

1. When you’re at some party, chain smoking on the roof with some strange girl with blue hair and exorbitant large dark eyes, ask her about her day. I promise you, you won’t
regret it. Often times you’ll find the strangest of people have the most captivating of stories to tell.


2. Please, never mistake desire for love. Love will engulf your soul, whilst desire will emerge as acid, slowly making it’s way through your veins, gradually burning you from the inside out.


3. No one is going to save you, anything you’ve ever read or heard otherwise is bullshit.


4. One day someone is going to come along who’s touch feels like fire and who’s words taste like vanilla, when they leave you, you will want to die. If you know anything at all, know that it is only temporary.


5. Your mental health comes before school baby, always. If it’s midnight, and you have an exam the next day but your hands have been shaking for the past hour and a half and you’re not so sure you want to be alive anymore, pull out that carton of Ben and Jerry’s and afterwords, go the fuck to bed.
So what if you get a 68% on the exam the next day? You took care of yourself and at the end of the day that will always come before a high test score. To hell with anyone who tells you differently.


— Abbie Nielsen (Ps.i also don't know who she is,but someone let her know we appreciate this :) )

Looking back at terrific 2014!!

Assalam Aleykum Warahmatullahy

Hey guys!

Can you believe its already 2015?WHAT!?The year has just flown by like one of those goodbye tissues in sad cliche movie scenes that we just can't stop watching.Nevertheless,2014 has been such an amazing year for me and i am extremely grateful for all the experiences i managed to stumble upon.I therefore decided to share some of these reflections with my awesome readers!I do apologize for the lack of posts though, i have been super busy with uni,swamped with tonnes of course work.Plus,this semester was filled with a number of trips so i was constantly on the road which i am not in the slightest bit complaining about!
It was actually TONNES of fun! *insert mischievous laughter*

So now you are in the know,lets recap!

What were the three best things that happened in 2014? Well,

• I got to travel to Uganda, which made it my first time out of the country.YESSSS!!!!

•  I went for a hike and survived!!!Not only that but it was so much fun that i am actually thinking about doing it again.However,the blisters,pain and exhaustion that come with it lead me to second guess my decision.
• I finally accepted that it is ok not to have all the answers.I was the kind of person who constantly calculated every move and worried about every outcome.I was not happy with where i was and Alhamdulillah 2014 was the year when i said, i am going to be bold and live my life to the fullest!No more sitting by the sidelines and watching life pass me by.Alhamdulillah now i can say i am so much happier because i put my trust in Allah (SW) and i know that wherever i am is exactly where i am suppose to be, and if i don't like where i am,i have the strength to change my situation.

Machakos scenery during the hike.

Up we go!

 What were the three worst things that happened in 2014?

• I have to say i wasn't as involved in Islamic events such as halaqas (Islamic circles) and darsas (Islamic lectures) and i also didn't gain as much knowledge as i would have loved to.I was too preoccupied with school and everything else i ended up neglecting my Islamic studies.Gaining knowledge helps a great deal in strengthening one's eeman and so when you take your Islamic studies for granted,in the end you are sabotaging your eeman.Which no one wants.
• My Camera was stolen.Yo i needed that camera.Anyways it is the will of Allah SW and i am content with it.
• My phone was stolen.No i am not careless or clumsy these things happen ok!Moving on...

What did you learn about yourself in 2014? That...

•  I want so many things and have so many dreams!My mind is constantly preoccupied with random things and if i don't take time out to just sort things out and put everything into perspective,i will have a nervous breakdown.Hence taking time out is key.
• I also learnt that i am capable of so much more and i should stop making excuses because only losers do that.And while its normal to be afraid,don't let the fear of failure or what people think stop you from being who you are and doing what you love.
• I really need to start being a morning person.Awwh man :(

My favorite 2014 experience.

• Feeding Giraffes at Haller Park!!(Which is a game park btw). It was quite a new and need i say slimy experience.I mean those guys have super long tongues but i loved it anyways!Especially because it was a family outing which does not happen very often.Although the hike to Machakos and trip to Uganda were also super amazing.

 

 

My biggest accomplishment of 2014.

• I would definitely say surviving my research methods course.Boy was that course a struggle and a half!At the beginning of the semester,my friends had warned me about taking that course with that particular  lecturer.Ofcourse being me i just shrugged and brushed it off.Little did i know i was signing up for my most challenging course yet.Looking back now i am really glad i took it up.If i had dropped the course it would only have been because of fear and that is definitely not what i am about.Furthermore, i am quite happy with how i performed so i feel that i did preety well!

Most amazing place i visited in 2014.

•  Machakos was preety amazing,but the scenery in Haller park was also quite breathtaking.Then again it is a game park so...yeah.It is also located in my home area so i don't really think that counts.And for some reason i only visited the park this year?

Best food you tasted in 2014.

•  Has to be 'Gonja' i hope i got that right, which is roasted bananas.A common delicacy in Uganda.Also 'Rolex' which is basically Mexican omelet rolled in chapati!So it's kind of like Shawarma only not as fancy seeing that its just plain omelet and chapati.

Favorite book of 2014.

• Unfortunately,not much reading happened during 2014.I I was reading the book 'How To Be Hap Hap Happy Like Me by Merrill Markoe and although it did not turn out to be what i expected from a self help book kind of view, i still enjoyed it.I think its a great read full of humor and such rich literature so i was quite content and glad that i actually read it.

Favorite movie of 2014

• I did not watch as many movies last year.2014 was definitely a series year.But,i did fall in love with the movie Stuck in love.I never get tired of watching it.

Best song of 2014.

• Mesut Kurtis - Eidun Saeed feat. Maher Zain.I loveeeeeeeeeeee this song!It just makes me want to have Eid every single day.Love it

• Sauti Sol- Sura Yako.I know it says favorite 'song' but come on, no one likes just one song!Everybody knows that!

• Davido-Aye...need i say more?

•  Moelogo- Thinking out Loud_6words (cover). I can't even.I just.can't.

Best event of 2014 you attended.

• Has to be the Mshkaki festival!I mean i got off from the plane and felt super emaciated!So i told my brother i was hungry and the next thing i know we're at the Mshkaki festival which i knew nothing about.Hence my excitement.Can you imagine being hungry and then finding yourself minutes later at a festival with all the local delicacies you can gobble down!?The people,the music,THE FOOD and it was at night which made it even more magical.It was the first time an event like this had been held so i was really grateful i was able to attend it.By the way Mshkaki is a swahili word which refers to roasted meat on a stick and then the meat is dipped in various sauces depending on one's liking.It's quite the delicacy here in Mombasa. 

THE END :)

I hope you guys enjoyed reading my post!I pray that this year will be even more awesome for all of us.May Allah (sw) allow us to be better,improve ourselves in every possible way,may we strive to please Him (sw) and may He (sw) forgive us for our shortcomings.Allahumma Ameen.
That being said,what was your favorite part of 2014?Comment,tweet,Facebook or even Instagram me because i love hearing from you guys!Bye!

It's about not giving up.

Assalam Aleykum Warahmatullahy Wabarakatuhu!

Hey guys! :)

Sometimes,I sit down and think about who I am and who I want to be.Living as a Muslim in today’s society is certainly not easy.When so many things have become the norm.Things like mixing with the opposite gender,listening to music and a whole bunch of other things that you already know about because we all actively engage in one or the other.

Obviously,no one wants to do the wrong thing.I think ultimately people are just searching for happiness.So we choose to engage in things that we believe will make us happy.Personally,I like to have fun.I love the feeling of being happy and experiencing life.I mean who doesn’t right?But I also hate the guilt that comes with doing the wrong thing.I know,no one’s perfect.We all sin and will continue to do so because that’s how Allah SW created us.But life just seems so difficult sometimes.I guess in all this hullabaloo we end up losing our focus and even ourselves.

You know when something happens to you so many times,you start to think that’s how things are always going to be.You start to forget that things could be different.I guess constantly being on the wrong has got me doubting if I could ever be good.

 They say that experience is the best teacher and I completely agree.It’s just that there are some things you never think you’ll ever go through or experience until they actually happen to you and then you end up having that “Oh wow I never saw that coming” moment. 

But one thing I’ve learnt is that you cannot afford to give up.Just because you’ve made a lot of mistakes,committed a lot of sins,doesn’t mean your chances of becoming better have died along with the mistakes you’ve made.I do believe that Allah SW is in control and nothing happens without Him SW willing it.So yes,everything does happen for a reason.Whether we understand those reasons or not.

No matter how bad things get,better days are coming.Keep trying to be better,to excel in every aspect of your life whether physically,religiously or socially.Don’t let your mistakes blind you from seeing the lessons behind them.And so what if you mess up?That’s the funny thing about life,that’s how we learn.So keep your head up.Keep praying,keep learning and keep messing up.It’s definitely not going to be easy,but it will be worth it in the end, in shaa allah.